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Ask Better Questions
- •Use one question at a time — never stack two questions together.
- •Prefer "What kind of…" over "Do you remember…"
- •Either/or choices are easier than open questions.
- •Share something first, then ask — "I love apple pie. What pie do you enjoy?"
- •Ask about feelings and preferences, not facts or dates.
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What Not to Say
- •Never say "Do you remember…" — it creates pressure.
- •Avoid correcting mistakes or wrong names — go with the flow.
- •Don't quiz or test — this isn't school.
- •Skip questions about recent events, dates, or timelines.
- •Never say "I already told you" or show frustration.
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Using Photos & Music
- •One photo at a time — don't overwhelm with albums.
- •Ask "What stands out to you?" instead of "Who is this?"
- •Familiar songs can unlock mood and energy instantly.
- •Let them look or listen without pressure to respond.
- •Use photos as conversation anchors, not memory tests.
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Handling Repetition
- •Repetition is normal — respond warmly each time.
- •They're not doing it on purpose. Be patient.
- •If a story is told again, enjoy it like the first time.
- •Gently redirect if the repetition causes distress.
- •Your calm reaction matters more than the words you say.
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Gentle Redirection
- •Validate the feeling first: "That sounds hard."
- •Then gently shift: "I was just thinking about something nice…"
- •Use sensory cues — a smell, a song, a warm drink.
- •Ask a simple choice: "Should we look at flowers or listen to music?"
- •It's okay to change topics as often as needed.
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Keep Visits Calm
- •Speak slowly, softly, and clearly.
- •Sit at eye level — don't stand over them.
- •Reduce background noise and distractions.
- •Short visits can be just as meaningful as long ones.
- •End on a warm note — "I really enjoyed this."
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Match Their Energy
- •On low-energy days, just sitting together is enough.
- •On good days, try more engaged conversation or activities.
- •Watch for signs of fatigue — shorter answers, less eye contact.
- •If they seem tired, switch to simpler prompts or music.
- •There's no wrong amount of talking. Silence is fine.
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Focus on Connection
- •The goal is connection, not information.
- •Being present matters more than being perfect.
- •Touch, tone, and warmth communicate love beyond words.
- •Celebrate small moments — a smile, a laugh, a squeeze of the hand.
- •You are enough. Showing up is the most important part.
